Friday, June 13, 2008

Meaningless Movie Quotes of the Day

All quotes from "Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang" starring Robert Downey Jr, Val Kilmer, and Michelle Monaghan.

"Newsflash, Perry, your client Ames, that's the little sister, repeat, the little sister. That's where Harmony's two grand went, it's in your bank, you overpriced bastard, her kid sister hired you! Your case and my case are the same fucking case!"- Harry Lockhart

"It's like someone lifted America by the east coast and shook it and all of the normal girls managed to hang on!"- Harry

Perry: Picture a bullet in your head.
Guard: Fuck you. Anyway, that's ambiguous.
Perry: Excuse me, how is that ambiguous?
Harry: I think he means that when you say 'picture a bullet in your head', okay, is that 'a bullet will be in your head' or is it 'picture it in your head'.

Harmony: You're new here. Look around. There's younger and better.
Harry: I don't want younger and better. I want you.

EDIT. And more quotes...

Perry: Merry Christmas. Sorry I fucked you over.
Harry: Don't quit your gay job.

Harry: So, again for the cheap seats: don't think, walk the fuck away. Or else we're going to have to go outside. It's past my bedtime. Make a choice.
[cut to Harry getting the CRAP kicked out of him. :) ]

Perry: [to the audience] Thanks for coming, please stay for the end credits, if you're wondering who the best boy is, it's somebody's nephew, um, don't forget to validate your parking, and to all you good people in the Midwest, sorry we said fuck so much.

Girl: What do you do for a living?
Harry: Oh, I'm retired. I invented dice as a kid.

12 comments:

Aisling said...

Oooo nice...Makes me want to watch that. Hmmm RDJ... I must agree with you on your blogs from tv.com he is pretty hott!!! :D

I love all the orangeness of your profile!!! :D
Does this coming back to blogging mean I'll get to read the end of the story you wrote?? *please*

Audrey Allen said...

OH MY GOODNESS!! I can't believe I forgot to email you the rest of my book. I'm such a bad friend. Emailing now. :)

Yes, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is a teriffic movie. RDJ is completely hilarious. Just a warning, there's a couple of *ahem* inappropriate scenes. Nothing graphic, just some female body parts that are usually covered. :)

Aisling said...

Thanks for the warning Aud. I tend to look anywhere but at the screen during scenes like that. :)

Audrey Allen said...

Haha, don't worry, so do I.

What's worse is when your mother is sitting right next to you. She didn't like all of the foul language, but I didn't really mind. It was very, very funny.

One of my favorite quotes that I forgot to include in the post (I think I'll go add it, actually):

Perry: Merry Christmas. Sorry I fucked you over.
Harry: Don't quit your gay job.

Because its a running joke throughout the movie that Perry is gay...they actually call him Gay Perry most of the time....you'll just have to see it to understand. It's hilarious in the correct context.

Aisling said...

Hmmmm yes it is so mortifying when your parents are there when there is cursing or nudity in movies.

I try so hard not to look at them or at the screen because I am so bashful.

They were watching Californication one night and I walked in to say Goodnight at a not so good part.

Oooo that quote is brilliant!!! :D
Must get money to rent the movie or anything!!!

Audrey Allen said...

Oh my goodness- Californication. I will never let my mom know I watched that. Talk about inappropriate.

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang is totally NOT that bad. :)

And I added more funny quotes. Another reason I love this movie is because the characters are self-aware--they realize they're in a movie and comment on it sometimes. It's pretty funny.

My second fav quote--

Girl: What do you do for a living?
Harry: Oh, I'm retired. I invented dice as a kid.

DICE??? Who thinks of stuff like that? Amazing.

Audrey Allen said...

Oh yeah, I have the DVD and if I can figure out how to rip the movie (which I've actually done before but I seem to have forgotten how), I can email you a copy. A gift. :) In apology for being so horrendously late on my novel-sending.

Aisling said...

Oh know it's fine. I can annoy my parents for a loan of some money by saying something like. "Please just let me borrow some money after all those hard exams."

it could work.

Dice?? That is ingenius!!!

Audrey Allen said...

Haha, "after all of these hard exams". My mom's supposed to be taking me out to dinner to celebrate my exam grades, but I just got cast in a musical, so that plan might have to be put off until the end of the summer. :)

My funny story (related to buying the movie): My mom picked me up from rehearsal and I was like "Hey, let's go to Blockbuster and get a movie. I'm bored.". So we got to the movie store and I looked around- of course, SOMEONE had rented the only copy of Kiss Kiss, Bang Bang. I was angry for about two seconds. Then I dashed off to the "Previously Rented" section. I found it!! But we had to buy it. I didn't care. :)

Aisling said...

Nice :D Ah the joy of good quality second hand books, DVDs and CDs. :)

Ooo what are you doing in the musical?? (When you reply I shall answer tomorrow because it's time to sleep/ read your novel, goodnight. :) )

Audrey Allen said...

Goodnight, dear Ais.

The musical is Singing in the Rain, and I'm the part of Dora Bailey, a gossip/ news radio person. I have a moderate amount of lines. I'm also doubling as a dancer. :) I get to do a tango across the stage, and a crazy hard tap number. Needless to say, I'm excited!!! :)

Aisling said...

Oooo wow that sounds amazing!!! I would so go see it if I could!!! :D